Since the beginning of time, girls have started preparing for their married lives long before they ever meet their groom.  Hope chests have been filled and dowries have been put together well in advance of any courtship, engagement or marriage taking place. 

Today’s brides are no different, and with the trend toward getting married at a later age, most women have their households pretty well set up before their wedding.  Therefore, it’s really not a big surprise when newlyweds prefer to receive cash as wedding gifts instead of toasters.

Although it is still considered poor etiquette to request cash on any invitation, it is not improper for close friends of the bride or groom to discreetly spread the word.   Most wedding guests will understand and comply. 

Bridal showers are considered different than weddings, however, and it is still fairly traditional to give a gift instead of cash for a shower.  Therefore, it is a good idea to register for gifts at your favorite local store.  No matter how well set up your new household is, extra towels, bed linens, or kitchen utensils can always come in handy.  If you do receive something you really don’t need, take it back to the store and exchange if for store credit.  The store credit is as good as cash and can come in extremely handy down the road on future necessary purchases.

Newlyweds need so many things when they first start out, such as towels, linens, dishes, glassware, and zillions of other necessary household items.  The choices are overwhelming and you may even worry about duplicating gifts.  The first rule of purchasing a wedding or bridal shower gift is to relax.  Anything you give the couple will be appreciated and if you do happen to duplicate something or choose the wrong color, the item can always be exchanged.  Most stores now give gift receipts which allow the return or exchange of an item without announcing how much was spent on the gift. 

First check to see if the couple has a gift registry at one or more stores.  Even if most of the gifts are already purchased, the registry can give you a good idea of the couples’ decorating preferences and styles.  One gift idea that never seems to go wrong is a picture frame.  I’m not talking about the wedding cake-shaped, white and silver frame that is good only for wedding pictures.  I’m referring to simple wooden frames, maybe even collage frames that allow the couple to decorate their walls with any pictures they choose.  Displaying happy moments from their dating days or their honeymoon is a great way to add character to any room and create a loving environment. 

If you’ve never had to set up a home before, you may have difficulty figuring out what you’ll need to begin your married life.  Any place you live, whether it’s a house or an apartment will need the essentials.  Here’s just a few ideas that you may want to add to your gift registries:

Kitchen ~ Cookware
Baking pans (cake pans, muffin tins, cookie sheets, etc.)
Frying pans (at least one large and one small)
Sauce pans with lids (at least one large and one small)
Cooking utensils (heat resistant spoons, spatulas, etc.)
Measuring cups
Measuring spoons

Kitchen ~ Dinnerware (best to start with a service for eight)
Dinner plates (large)
Salad or lunch plates (medium)
Bread & butter plates (small)
Cups and saucers
Water glasses
Juice glasses
Wine glasses
Serving platter
Serving bowls (at least 2 large)
Soup bowls
Sugar bowl and creamer set
Salt and pepper shakers
Silverware (including spoons, soup spoons, forks, salad forks, knives)
Additional silverware items (steak knives, gravy ladle, slotted spoon, pie server, etc.)
Good sharp knife set

Bathroom Linens
Large bath towels (best to start out with at least four)
Hand towels
Wash clothes
Shower curtain
Bath mat
Decorative guest towels

Kitchen Linens
Dish towels (4 - 6)
Dish clothes
Large formal tablecloth
Cloth napkins (set of eight)

Bedroom Linens
Sheet sets (flat, fitted, and pillowcases) at least 2 sets for each bedroom
Pillows
Blankets
Comforter
Mattress pad

Misc. Items
Coasters
Wastebaskets
Broom & dustpan set
Cleaning products (pot scrubbers, rubber gloves, buckets, etc.)
Clocks
Rugs
Organization tools (shelves, storage boxes, hangars, etc.)

Of course, this is not an exhaustive list, but they do cover the absolute essentials.  As time goes on you’ll discover many other items that you can’t live without.  Starting up a home can be an adventure.  Enjoy!

Setting up a gift registry these days is absolutely essential.  They simplify the whole gift giving process for your guests by listing the specific items, quantities, colors, prices, and sometimes even their location in the store.  They are also a tremendous benefit to the bride and groom by making sure you get exactly what you need, in the colors and quantities you need them.  If used properly, they also help eliminate duplications, and thereby, returns.

When setting up your gift registry, you’ll want to keep a few things in mind:

1.  Try to limit yourself to one or two stores that most of your guests will have access to.  Multiple registries are difficult to keep track of and manage.

2.  Double-check the spelling of all names, addresses and personal information on the registry.  You don’t want guests sending your gifts to the wrong location.

3.  Choose items in a range of prices so there will be something on the registry that everyone can afford.  Remember, guests will also refer to these registries for bridal shower and couple’s shower gifts.

4.  List a variety of items.  Don’t limit yourself to bath towels, place settings, and toasters.  Power tools, camping equipment, gardening tools, etc. are now perfectly acceptable wedding registry gifts. 

5.  Check your registry often to make sure there are still items available in a large price range.  When you see that all you have left is the $200 vacuum, you’ll want to add some more lower priced items.

Last, but not least, have fun creating your gift registry!