Giving someone an engagement ring is a big step; so is accepting one.  Although there really aren’t many ‘rules’ involved in the whole engagement process, there are a few guidelines that might make things a little easier.

If you want to surprise your girlfriend with a diamond, you’ll want to make sure you know her likes and dislikes regarding shape, size, setting design, etc., before you lay down a large amount of money.  It never hurts to go window shopping a little while you’re strolling together through the mall.  Listen closely to what she says she likes and be sure to remember the details.  Whether the band is gold or silver may not make a big difference to you, but it will to your bride. 

If the two of you have been talking marriage for a while now, and surprising her isn’t the most important thing, you’ll want to go ring shopping together.  Know your budget!  Although it is not necessary for your wedding band and her wedding band to match, you may find a better value by purchasing the three rings together.  Traditionally, the bride pays for the groom’s ring and vice versa.  If cost is a big factor, you may want to use the engagement ring as a wedding ring also.  If this is the route you choose to take, be sure the bride takes off the ring and gives it to the best man before the actual ceremony. 

There is one big ‘no-no’ when it comes to engagement rings.  If this is your second marriage, or even your second engagement, it is never okay to give your ex’s engagement ring to your new fiance. 

The dream wedding all begins with the proposal so be sure to put some effort into how it will all play out.  Romantic proposal scenarios are plentiful and a thoughtful groom-to-be will spend some time devising the perfect way to ‘pop the question’.  Here’s a few ideas to get your creative juices flowing:

  *  Recreate a special moment in your relationship by proposing to her at the same place where you had your first date,  first kiss, or where you first told her you loved her. 

  *  Keep it a private experience by inviting her over for a home-cooked romantic dinner for two by candlelight.  My future son-in-law proposed when he came to our house to visit over Christmas break from college.  He got up before anyone else in the house and prepared a beautiful candlelit breakfast for my daughter. 

  *  Choose a place and time where the two of you can focus on each other.  Take a quiet walk in the park, a boat ride on the lake, or go for a picnic.  Outdoor scenery can add the perfect touch of romance to a proposal.

*  Use an innovative approach like attaching her engagement ring to a cruise ship luggage tag.  Hand her the tag, explaining that she can use the luggage tag when you go on your honeymoon.

  *  If you’re a more ‘extreme’ kind of guy, propose in a hot air balloon, on top of a mountain, or on an underwater scuba dive.

The words you choose are just as important as the location.  Make it as short and sweet as possible.  Preparing a lengthy heartfelt speech may seem like a good idea at the time, but a proposal can make even the toughest guy nervous enough to forget his own name.  Once you get down on one knee, your bride-to-be will figure out what’s going on and volumes of words won’t really matter.  However you decide to propose, make it memorable.  This is a moment of your life that neither you or your bride-to-be will ever forget.